Humour Quotes

Humour Quotes

1. A FOOLish man tells a woman to STOP talking, but a WISE man tells her that she looks extremely BEAUTIFUL when her LIPS are CLOSED.
2. One GOOD way to REDUCE Alcohol consumption : Before Marriage - Drink whenever you are SAD After Marriage - Drink whenever you are HAPPY 3. Three FASTEST means of Communication : 1. Tele-Phone 2. Tele-Vision
3. Tell to Woman Need still FASTER - Tell her NOT to tell ANY ONE.
4. Love your friends not their sisters. Love your sisters not their friends.
 5. A man got 2 wishes from GOD. He asked for the Best wine and Best Woman. Next moment, he had the Best Wine and Mother Teresa next to him. Moral : BE SPECIFIC
 6. What is a BEST and WORST news you can hear at the SAME time ? It is when your Girl Friend says YOU are the BEST KISSER among all your Friends.
 7. Let us be generous like this : Four Ants are moving through a forest. They see an ELEPHANT coming towards them. Ant 1 says : we should KILL him. Ant 2 says : No, Let us break his Leg alone. Ant 3 says : No, we will just throw him away from our path. Ant 4 says : No, we will LEAVE him because he is ALONE and we are FOUR.
8. If you do NOT have a Girl Friend - You are missing SOME thing in your life. If you HAVE a Girl Friend - You are missing EVERY thing in your life.
9. Question : When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their MISTAKE. Answer : On their MARRIAGE.
10. When your LIFE is in DARKNESS, PRAY GOD and ask him to free you from Darkness. Even after you pray, if U R still in Darkness - Please PAY the ELECTRICITY BILL.
 11. Why Government do NOT allow a Man to MARRY 2 Women. Because per Constitution, you can NOT PUNISH TWICE for the same Mistake.
 12. "A Ship is always safe at the shore - but that is NOT what it is built for" - Albert Einstein

Shiv Khera Winners dont't do different things They do things differently

Shiv Khera Winners dont't do different things.

They do things differently

From washing cars and selling life insurance in the USA 30 years ago, Shiv Khera has come a long way. His multi-million dollar empire was built from scratch with sheer grit and he exemplifies his motivational trademark signature-line: 'Winners don't do different things, they do things differently.' His greatest claim to fame is in his pioneering work in this field, both in the USA and in India .

Shiv Khera talks of his background as the grandson of a man who owned collieries in Dhanbad before they were nationalized. With disarming candor, Khera says that he failed in class ten and barely made it as a commerce graduate.
He talks of his failures, and of the effort that went into his eventual success. He speaks of his struggle to find a footing in Canada and the USA before he met Norman Vincent Peale whose motivational teaching changed his life forever.

Khera's book, You Can Win, an international bestseller, is an intelligently created motivational tool. One cannot but admire a man for walking his talk, for living his lectures, for having been there before acting as a catalyst to show you the way.

He is a celebrity and the adulation that people shower on him is mind-boggling. Qualified Learning Systems, Khera's flagship organization, charges phenomenal amounts of money to conduct corporate workshops and companies willingly pay to hear him speak. ''It is high time that people took a stand,'' says Khera, ''those who are indifferent to injustice are as much to blame as the perpetrators. We have to become responsible, we cannot ignore our neighbor's plight, we must get involved.'' He says that we must make a clear distinction between detached action and indifferent noninvolvement.

He is very firm in his belief that we all need to note our social responsibility alongside our personal duties. Discipline is high on his agenda of self-development, as are self-esteem and a winner's attitude. He gives a comprehensive list of attitudes that winners and losers have.

Examples: 'Winners see the potential; losers see the past.
Winners see the gain; losers see the pain.
The winner is always part of the answer; the loser is always a part of the problem.' Defining the winning edge,
 Khera says: ''In order to get the winning edge, we need to strive for excellence, not perfection.
Striving for perfection is neurotic, striving for excellence is progress.''
His definition of success is: ''Knowing you have done a job well and have achieved your objective. Success is not measured by our position in life but by the obstacles we overcame to get there.
People who have overcome obstacles are more secure than those who have never faced them.''

You Can Win relates an English proverb that says: ''A smooth sea never made a skillful mariner.'' Everything is difficult before it becomes easy.
 Shiv Khera is a winner. He has a veritable who's who list of corporate clients including a number of diplomats who swear by his teaching methods.
 He divides his time between workshops in India, Singapore and the USA.

Shiv Khera Winners dont't do different things They do things differently

Shiv Khera Winners dont't do different things.

They do things differently

From washing cars and selling life insurance in the USA 30 years ago, Shiv Khera has come a long way. His multi-million dollar empire was built from scratch with sheer grit and he exemplifies his motivational trademark signature-line: 'Winners don't do different things, they do things differently.' His greatest claim to fame is in his pioneering work in this field, both in the USA and in India . Shiv Khera talks of his background as the grandson of a man who owned collieries in Dhanbad before they were nationalized. With disarming candor, Khera says that he failed in class ten and barely made it as a commerce graduate. He talks of his failures, and of the effort that went into his eventual success. He speaks of his struggle to find a footing in Canada and the USA before he met Norman Vincent Peale whose motivational teaching changed his life forever. Khera's book, You Can Win, an international bestseller, is an intelligently created motivational tool. One cannot but admire a man for walking his talk, for living his lectures, for having been there before acting as a catalyst to show you the way. He is a celebrity and the adulation that people shower on him is mind-boggling. Qualified Learning Systems, Khera's flagship organization, charges phenomenal amounts of money to conduct corporate workshops and companies willingly pay to hear him speak. ''It is high time that people took a stand,'' says Khera, ''those who are indifferent to injustice are as much to blame as the perpetrators. We have to become responsible, we cannot ignore our neighbor's plight, we must get involved.'' He says that we must make a clear distinction between detached action and indifferent noninvolvement. He is very firm in his belief that we all need to note our social responsibility alongside our personal duties. Discipline is high on his agenda of self-development, as are self-esteem and a winner's attitude. He gives a comprehensive list of attitudes that winners and losers have. Examples: 'Winners see the potential; losers see the past. Winners see the gain; losers see the pain. The winner is always part of the answer; the loser is always a part of the problem.' Defining the winning edge, Khera says: ''In order to get the winning edge, we need to strive for excellence, not perfection. Striving for perfection is neurotic, striving for excellence is progress.'' His definition of success is: ''Knowing you have done a job well and have achieved your objective. Success is not measured by our position in life but by the obstacles we overcame to get there. People who have overcome obstacles are more secure than those who have never faced them.'' You Can Win relates an English proverb that says: ''A smooth sea never made a skillful mariner.'' Everything is difficult before it becomes easy. Shiv Khera is a winner. He has a veritable who's who list of corporate clients including a number of diplomats who swear by his teaching methods. He divides his time between workshops in India, Singapore and the USA.