Good One Liners Joke/Humour/Fun

Good One Liners Joke/Humour/Fun

He is dark and handsome. When it's dark, he's handsome.

----------------
Teaching is the greatest act of optimism.
----------------
If money won't make you happy, you won't like poverty either.
---------------
A somebody was once a nobody who wanted to and did.
---------------
Everyone believes in heredity until their children act like fools
----------------
There is a guaranteed way to get what you want... want less
--------------
In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker
-------------
All men are different, but husbands are all alike
------------
I am not single, I'm romantically challenged
-----------
On the internet nothing is illegal, its all e-legal
----------
Make crime pay, become a lawyer.
---------
We the willing, following the unknowing are doing the impossible. We have
done so much for so long with so little that we are now able to do anything with nothing
---------
National Debt: When everyone exceeds their charge card limits
---------
A good listener is usually thinking about something else
--------
Hard work must have killed someone!
--------
You can't buy love, but you can pay heavily for it
--------
I fell in love at first sight... I should have looked twice
--------
Freedom of speech is wonderful, it's right up there with the freedom not to listen
--------
All tragedies are finished by a death, all comedies by a marriage
---------
Integrity is like oxygen - the higher you go, the less there is of it.

*************************************************************************