Saturday, May 7, 2011

IK BAAT KAHOO???

IK BAAT KAHOO???

Bay Baat Bigartey Rehtey Ho,
Bay Chain Hamesha Rehtey Ho,

Yeh sab Nishani ISHQ Ki Hai,
Kiya ISHQ Kise Say Kerte Ho?

Kiyoon Ratoon Ko Jagtey Rehtey Ho?
Aur Tarey Bhi Tum Gintey Ho,
Yeh sab Nishani ISHQ Ke Hai,
Kiya ISHQ Kise say Kertey Ho?


Zikar Jo Mera Chalta Hai,
Chehrey ka Rang Badalta Hai,
Bay chain say Tum Ho Jatey Ho,
Kiya ISHQ "MUJH" Hi Say Kertey Ho ?

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Quotes

Quotes

One's best success comes after their greatest disappointments."

-- Henry Ward Beecher
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"Repetition does not transform a lie into a truth."
-- Franklin D. Roosevelt
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If standard of living is your major objective, quality of life almost never improves, but if quality of life is your number one objective, your standard of living almost always improves.
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"Always do right - this will gratify some and astonish the rest." Mark Twain
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"Your reputation is in the hands of others. That's what a reputation is. You can't control that. The only thing you can control is your character."Dr. Wayne W. Dyer
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"Nothing great has ever been achieved except by those who dared believe something inside them was superior to circumstances."
--Bruce Barton
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"Of all the properties which belong to honorable men, not one is so highly prized as that of character."
-  Henry Clay
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"Circumstances do not make a man, they reveal him." Dr. Wayne W. Dyer
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"Die when I may, I want it said by those who knew me best that I always plucked a thistle and planted a flower where I thought a flower would grow." Abraham Lincoln
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"Judge of your natural character by what you do in your dreams." Ralph Waldo Emerson
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"There is nothing in which people more betray their character than in what they laugh at." Goethe

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"It's really a wonder that I haven't dropped all my ideals, because they seem so absurd and impossible to carry out. Yet I keep them, because in spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart." Anne Frank
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"Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved." Helen Keller

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"Who you are speaks so loudly I can't hear what you're saying." Ralph Waldo Emerson
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That which does not kill me, makes me stronger." A SEAL Team saying,

- By Frederick Nietzsche.

BEAUTIFUL LUV STORY TO SHARE WITH EVERYONE


BEAUTIFUL LUV STORY TO SHARE WITH EVERYONE


There was once this guy who is very much in love with his girl. This romantic guy folded 1,000 pieces of paper cranes as a gift to his girl.

Although, at that time he was just a small fry in his company, his future didn't seem too bright, they were very happy together. Until one day, his girl told him she was going to Paris and will never come back. She also told him that she cannot visualize any future for the both of them, so they went their own ways there and then...

Heartbroken, the guy agreed. But when he regained his confidence, he worked hard day and night, slogging his body and mind just to make something out of himself.

Finally with all the hard work and the help of friends, this guy had set up his own company .

You never fail until you stop trying. One rainy day, while this guy was driving, he saw an elderly couple sharing an umbrella in the rain walk ing to some destination. Even with the umbrella, they were still
drenched. It didn't take him long to realize they were his girl's parents.

With a heart in getting back at them, he drove slowly beside the couple, wanting them to spot him in his luxury sedan. He wanted them  to know that he wasn't the same any more; he had his own company, car,
condo, etc. He made it! What he saw next confused him, the couple was walking towards a cemetery, and so he got out of his car and followed...and he saw his girl, a photograph of her smiling sweetly as
ever at him from her tombstone and he saw his paper cranes right beside her...

Her parents saw him. He asked them why this had happened. They explained, she did not leave for France at all. She was ill with cancer. She had believed that he will make it someday, but she did not want to be his obstacle... therefore she had chosen to leave him. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you wa nt them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have. She had wanted her parents to put his paper cranes beside her, when shw will die.

Who is Warren Buffet ?

Who is Warren Buffet ?

There was a one hour interview on CNBC with Warren Buffet, the second richest man who has donated $31 billion to charity Here are some very interesting aspects of his life:


1. He bought his first share at age 11 and he now regrets that he started too late!


2. He bought a small farm at age 14 with savings from delivering newspapers.


3. He still lives in the same small 3-bedroom house in mid-town Omaha, that he bought after he got married 50 years ago. He says that he has everything he needs in that house. His house does not have a wall or a fence.


4. He drives his own car everywhere and does not have a driver or security people around him.


5. He never travels by private jet, although he owns the world's largest private jet company.


6. His company, Berkshire Hathaway, owns 63 companies. He writes only one letter each year to the CEOs of these companies, giving them goals


for the year. He never holds meetings or calls them on a regular basis. He has given his CEO's only two rules. Rule number 1: do not lose any


of your share holder's money. Rule number 2: Do not forget rule number 1.


7. He does not socialize with the high society crowd. His past time after he gets home is to make himself some pop corn and watch Television.


8. Bill Gates, the world's richest man met him for the first time only 5 years ago. Bill Gates did not think he had anything in common with Warren Buffet. So he had scheduled his meeting only for half hour. But when Gates met him, the meeting lasted for ten hours and Bill Gates became a devotee of Warren Buffet.


9. Warren Buffet does not carry a cell phone, nor has a computer on his desk.

His advice to young people: "Stay away from credit cards and invest in yourself and Remember:


A. Money doesn't create man but it is the man who created money.
B. Live your life as simple as you are.
C. Don't do what others say, just listen them, but do what you feel good.
D. Don't go on brand name; just wear those things in which u feel comfortable.
E. Don't waste your money on unnecessary things

family problem [humour]

family problem [ Time Pass humour]

Two men, one American and an Indian were sitting in a bar drinking shot after shot.


The Indian man said to the American, "You know my parents are forcing me to get married to this so called homely girl from a village whom I haven't even met once." We call this arranged marriage.

I don't want to marry a woman whom I don't love... I told them that openly and now have a hell lot of family problems."

The American said, Talking about love marriages... I'll tell you my story.

I married a widow whom I deeply loved and dated for 3 years. "After a couple of years, my father fell in love with my step-daughter and so my father became my son-in-law and I became my father's father-in-law.

Legally now my daughter is my mother and my wife my grandmother.

More problems occurred when I had a son. My son is my father's brother and so he is my uncle. Situations turned worse when my father had a son. Now my father's son i.e. my brother is my grandson.

Ultimately, I have become my own grand father and I am my own grandson.

And you say you have family problems..

Quotes for Perseverance

 Perseverance

"On the mountains of truth you can never climb in vain: either you will reach a point higher up today, or you will be training your powers so that you will be able to climb higher tomorrow." - Friedrich Nietzsche
------------------------------------------
"In the confrontation between the stream and the rock, the stream always wins- not through strength but by perseverance." - H. Jackson Brown
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"People of mediocre ability sometimes achieve outstanding success because they don't know when to quit. Most men succeed because they are determined to." -  George E. Allen
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"Perseverance is more prevailing than violence; and many things which cannot be overcome when they are together, yield themselves up when taken little by little." Plutarch
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"Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another." Walter Elliott
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"It's not so important who starts the game but who finishes it." John Wooden
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"Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no help at all."  - Dale Carnegie
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"All great masters are chiefly distinguished by the power of adding a second, a third, and perhaps a fourth step in a continuous line. Many a man has taken the first step. With every additional step you enhance immensely the value of your first." Ralph Waldo Emerson
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"Consider the postage stamp; its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing until it gets there." Josh Billings
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"Some men give up their designs when they have almost reached the goal; While others, on the contrary, obtain a victory by exerting, at the last moment, more vigorous efforts than ever before." - Herodotus
---------------------------------------------
"Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts.
Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.

Monday, May 2, 2011

7 Secrets of Success..

7 Secrets of Success..


Roof said: Aim High


Fan said: Be Cool


Clock said: Every minute is precious


Mirror said: Reflect before you act


Window said: See the World


Calendar said: Be up-to-date


Door said: Push hard to achieve your goals

SMUGGLER SARDAR JI

SMUGGLER SARDAR JI

A sardarji comes up to the Pakistan border on his bike. He's got two large bags over his shoulders.
The guard Iqbal stops him and says, 'What's in the bags?' 'Sand,' answered the Sardarji.
-------------------
Iqbal says, 'We'll just see about that. Get off the bike.'
Iqbal's guard takes the bags and rips them apart, he empties them out and finds nothing in them but sand. He detains the sardarji all night and has the sand analyzed, only to discover that there is nothing but pure sand in the bags.
Iqbal releases the sardaji, puts the sand into new bags, hefts them onto the sardarji's shoulders, and lets him cross the border.
-----------------
A week later, the same thing happens. Iqbal asks, 'What have you got?'
'Sand,' says the Sardarji.
----
Iqbal does his thorough examination and discovers that the bags contain nothing but sand. He gives the sand back to the Sardar, and crosses the border on his bike. This sequence of events is repeated every day for
three years.
------
Finally, the Sardarji doesn't show up one day and the guard, Iqbal, meets him in a 'Dhaba' in Islamabad.

'Hey, Buddy,' says Iqbal, 'I know you are smuggling something. It's driving me crazy. It's all I think about...I can't sleep. Just between you and me, what are you smuggling?'

The Sardaji, sips his Lassi and says, 'Bikes'

*******************************************************************************

Funny Interview in a Software Company

Interview in a Software Company : What a Fun

One of the best interviews!!!


Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.
Candidate: I am SAMEER GUPTA. I did my Tele Communication engineering from BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology.
-----------
Interviewer: BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology? I had never heard of this college before!
Candidate: Great! Even I had not heard of it before getting an admission into it . What happened is - due to cricket world cup I scored badly! in 12th.I was getting a paid seat in a good college. But my father said (I prefer to call him 'baap') - "I can not invest so much of money".(The baap actually said - "I will never waste so much of money on you"). So I had to join this college. Frankly speaking this name - BabanRao Dhole-Patil, can at the most be related to a Shetakari Mahavidyalaya.
----------------------
Interviewer: ok, ok. It seems you have taken 6 years to complete your engineering.
Candidate: Actually I tried my best to finish it in 4 years. But you know, these cricket matches and football world cup, and tennis tournaments. It is difficult to concentrate. So I flunked in 2nd and 3rd year. So in all I took 4 + 2 = 7 years.
-----------
Interviewer: But 4+2 is 6.
Candidate: Oh, is it? You know I always had KT in maths. But I will try to keep this in mind. 4+2 is 6, good, thanks. These cricket matches really affect exams a lot. I think they should ban it.
-----------
Interviewer: Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned.
Candidate: No, no... I am talking about Exams!!
-----------
Interviewer: Ok, What is your biggest achievement in life?
Candidate: Obviously, completing my Engineering. My mom never thought I would complete it. In fact, when i flunked in 3rd year, she was looking for a job for me in BEST (Bus corporation in Maharashtra) through some relative.
-------------------
Interviewer: Do you have any plans of higher study?
Candidate: he he he.. Are you kidding? Completing 'lower' education itself was so much of pain!!

**********************************************************************

Good One Liners Joke/Humour/Fun

Good One Liners Joke/Humour/Fun

He is dark and handsome. When it's dark, he's handsome.

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Teaching is the greatest act of optimism.
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If money won't make you happy, you won't like poverty either.

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A somebody was once a nobody who wanted to and did.
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Everyone believes in heredity until their children act like fools
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There is a guaranteed way to get what you want... want less
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In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker
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All men are different, but husbands are all alike
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I am not single, I'm romantically challenged
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On the internet nothing is illegal, its all e-legal
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Make crime pay, become a lawyer.

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We the willing, following the unknowing are doing the impossible. We have
done so much for so long with so little that we are now able to do anything with nothing
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National Debt: When everyone exceeds their charge card limits
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A good listener is usually thinking about something else
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Hard work must have killed someone!
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You can't buy love, but you can pay heavily for it
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I fell in love at first sight... I should have looked twice
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Freedom of speech is wonderful, it's right up there with the freedom not to listen

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All tragedies are finished by a death, all comedies by a marriage
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Integrity is like oxygen - the higher you go, the less there is of it.

*************************************************************************

White Hair

White Hair

One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.



She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?"


Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."


The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Then why are ALL of grandma's hairs white?"

quotes that cud motivate u


Some quotes that cud motivate u !!! Gud day !!!

Plan your work and work your plan.

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I am the master of my fate; I am the captain of my soul.
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You can learn new things at any time in your life if you're willing to be a beginner. If you actually learn to like being a beginner, the whole world opens up to you.

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There are two primary choices in life to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them.
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Destiny is no matter of chance. It is a matter of choice: It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved.
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The problem is not that there are problems. The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem.
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You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do.
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Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Willing is not enough; we must do. -
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Your most valuable asset can be your willingness to persist longer than anyone else.
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Destiny is not a matter of chance, but a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for it is a thing to be achieved.

---------
To achieve something you've never achieved before, you must become someone you've never been before.
--------
The secret of happiness is not doing what one likes, but liking what one has to do.
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The older I grow, the more I listen to people who don't say much.
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I do not ask for any crown but that which all may win; nor try to conquer any world except the one within.
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I do not pray for a lighter load, but for a stronger back.

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It's a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it.
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Not doing more than average is what keeps the average down.
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Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.
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Anger blows out the candle of the mind.
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Accept the challenges, so that you may feel the exhilaration of victory.
---------------------**************---------------------************-------------------

Time Pass Humour & Jones


Time Pass Humour & Jones

Gal: Is dress ka kya price hai?

Shopkeeper: Sirf 5 kiss.
Girl: Aur us dress ka?
Shopkeeper: 10 kiss.
Girl: Dono dress pack kar do, bill dadi dengi.
-----------------
Ganguly’s Son: Yeh Kya, Daddy Sixer pe Sixer maare jaa rahe hain Hain?
Ganguly’s Wife: Arey beta, yeh toh ADVERTISEMENT Hai !
------------------
U luv sumone... u marry sumone else. The one u marry becomes ur wife or husband & the one u loved becomes the password of your emai id...!
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Kudi waale pandit nu: Saanu aheja munda chahida jehra kuj khanda penda na howe.
Pandit: Aheja munda taan PGI Emergency ward ch hi mil sakda hai.
----------------------
Ravan ki 20 aankhein thi magar nazar sirf ek aurat pe;
jab ki aapki 2 aankhein aur nazar har aurat pe...!
Toh asli Ravan kaun??
------------------------
Ab tak meri life ek khuli botal thi, jis mein se sab perfume ki tarah ud jata tha. Par aap ke aane se sab kuch ruk gaya. Bhagwan kare aap jaisa DHAKKAN sabko miley.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

139 Rail Sampark

139 Rail Sampark (Indian Railway)

Rail Sampark 139 provides information about passenger trains such as arrival / deparure time, PNR status, tatkal status, fare enquiry, accommodation availability etc.

How to use the SMS service of 139 Rail Sampark

For Train Enquiry -
type TRAIN
---------------------------------
For Train Status Enquiry
type PNR<10 digit PNR Number>
-----------------------------------
For Seat Availability -
type  TRAIN
---------------------------------------
For Train Fare -
type FARE
---------------------------------------
Dial 139 For Any Rail-related Enquiry

Sunday, May 1, 2011

101 things to see and do in Mumbai (Bombay)


101 things to see and do in Mumbai (Bombay)

-----------------------------
1 Ride the Gateway ferry
The water’s brackish and there’s roughly one life-belt for every 20 passengers. But don’t let that stop you from taking a joyride on one of the ferries at Apollo Bunder. The 20-minute ride around the harbour is perfectly safe, so long as you don’t lean too far out of the boat.
Gateway of India, Apollo Bunder. Ferries leave roughly every 15 minutes. Rs 50.
Gateway of India Counter Tel.No.2284 1877.
---------------------------------
2 Gape outside Mannat and Jalsa and Galaxy
After a stroll along Bandstand’s promenade, take a long pit stop outside Shah Rukh Khan’s mansion Mannat, where, if you’re lucky, King Khan may emerge from the gate as he’s driven to his next shoot. Meanwhile, Amitabh Bachchan has shifted from his old bungalow Pratiksha to the brand new Jalsa.
Address: Shah Rukh Khan’s Mannat, Band Stand, Bandra (West), Mumbai 400050, India.
Address: Salman Khan 3 Galaxy Apartments BJ Road, Bandra Mumbai 400 050
Address:Amitabh Bachchan Pratiksha, 10th Rd,J.V.P.D. Scheme,Bombay 400049
Jalsa , near St Joseph’s High School, Juhu, Vile Parle (W)  It is said his bungalows, Pratiksha and Jalsa, in Juhu, are together worth a whopping Rs 1,60 crore. Interestingly, Jalsa, his second home, was gifted to him.
----------------------------------
3 Bet on the horses
The Derby is strictly for wannabes. For the real deal, visit the Mahalaxmi Racecourse on a normal raceday – twice to four times a week, depending on the time of year – and put your lot in with the punters of every description who mill about the bookies. It doesn’t matter if you don’t know your Flying Ranee from your Flying Toofan, just go with the favourites.
Royal Western India Turf Club, Mahalaxmi.
---------------------------------------------

Leave application

Leave application  (Found  Throgh Email Box / Net Surfing)


This is a collection of leave letters and applications written by people in various places of India...


1. Infosys, Bangalore: An employee applied for leave as follows:
Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife, please sanction me one-week leave.


2. This is from Oracle Bangalore: From an employee who was performing the "mundan" ceremony of his 10 year old son: "as I want to shave my son's head, please leave me for two days."


3. Another gem from CDAC. Leave-letter from an employee who was performing his daughter's wedding:
"as I am marrying my daughter, please grant a week's leave.."


4. From H.A.L. Administration dept:
"As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it, please grant me 10 days leave."


5. Another employee applied for half day leave as follows:
"Since I've to go to the cremation ground at 10 o-clock and I may not return, please grant me half day casual leave"


6. An incident of a leave letter "I am suffering from fever, please declare one day holiday."
7. A leave letter to the headmaster:
"As I am studying in this school I am suffering from headache. I request you to leave me today"
8. Another leave letter written to the headmaster:
"As my headache is paining, please grant me leave for the day."
9. Covering note:
"I am enclosed herewith..."
10. Another one:
"Dear Sir: with reference to the above, please refer to my below..."
11. Actual letter written for application of leave:
"My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her only husband at home I may be granted leave".
12. Letter writing: -
"I am in well here and hope you are also in the same well."
13. A candidate's job application:
"This has reference to your advertisement calling for a ' Typist and an Accountant - Male or Female'... As I am both(!! )for the past several years and I can handle both with good experience, I am applying for the post.




SARDAR JOKES

SARDAR JOKE

At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand, oh!
Sardar: Control yourself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying?
--------
Sardar: U cheated me.
Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.
Sardar: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says this is 'All India Radio! '
--------
Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?
Sardar: An old king's skeleton.
Tourist: Who's that smaller skeleton next to it?
Sardar: That was same king's skeleton when he was a child.
-------
Sardar declares:
.... . . I will never marry in my life &. . .
.. . . I'll give same advice to my children also. . . ..
-----------------
A donkey kicked a Sardar & ran away
Sardar ran to catch the donkey.
He saw a zebra & started beating it & said 'SALA Tracksuit pahan ke dhoka de raha hai'.
----------------
Santa went to Mysore palace.
Tourist guide - Santaji plz dont sit there, its Tipu sultan's chair
Santa - Oye dont worry yaar i'll get up when he comes.!!..
---------
Sardar wanted to make a STD call to punjab,

He wanted to save money so what did he do?
Simple, he went to punjab and made a local call..
----------
One tourist from U.S.A.asked to Sardar: Any great man born in this village?
Sardar: No sir, only small babies!!!
---------
Teacher: A for?
Sardar: Apple
Teacher: Jor se bolo?
Sardar: Jay mata di.
----------
2 sardars were fighting after exam.
Sir: Y r u fighting?
1st Sardar: This fool left the answer sheet blank,
Sir: So what?
1st Sardar: Even i did the same thing, now teacher will think that we both copied.
-----------
Sardar is in a dissection class of cockroach. He cuts its 1 leg, and says, "chal", it walks.
He cuts 2nd and 3rd legs and said, "chal" , it walks.
He cuts all the legs and said, "chal....." Finally he wrote the conclusion.......
..... "after all the legs of a cockroach are cut - it becomes deaf......"
--------------
2 sardarjis looking at Egyptian mummy.
Sar 1 : Look so many bandages, pakka lorry accident case.
Sar 2 : Aaho, lorry number is also written...BC 1760!!!....
-------------
A sardar on an interview 4 da post detective.
Interviewer : who killed Gandhi?
Sardar : Thank u sir 4 giving me d job, I will start investigating.......
------------
2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1: What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
Sardar 2: Dont worry, I have one more.
------------
Sardar: What is the name of your car?
Lady: I forgot the name, but is starts with 'T'.
Sardar: Oh, what a strange car, starts with Tea. All cars that I know start with petrol.
---------
Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer. Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
Sardar: Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright.
-----------
Museum Administrator: That's a 500-year-old statue u've broken..
Sardar: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.

Joke


This particular joke won the award for the best joke in a competition organized in Britain and it was sent by an Indian...



Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go on a camping trip, set up their tent, and fall asleep.
Some hours later, Holmes wakes his faithful friend.
"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
Watson replies, "I see millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?"
Watson ponders for a minute.
"Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.
Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo.
Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three.
Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant.
Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?"
Holmes is silent for a moment, then speaks.
"Someone has stolen our tent".


What it brings out is how we tend to complicate issues and then miss the most obvious things. Too much knowledge is no help unless we have the wisdom to guide it to an effective conclusion.

What is the Third Word : Test Your Knowledge

What is the Third Word : Test Your Knowledge

Think of words ending in "-gry". "Angry" and "hungry" are two of them.



There are only three words in the English language. What is the third word? The word is something that everyone uses every day. If you have read carefully, I have already told you what third word is.


If u already gave up - send this to your friends the answer will pop up on the screen automatically.

OR See Answer through Comment posted by me.

Hardwork and Luck

Hardwork is like the stairs, luck is like a lift ; Lify may fail sometimes but whatever may be the occassion, stairs will always take you to the TOP

Good To Read : May I know the Time, Please

May I know the Time, Please

Young Man: Sir, may I know the time, please?

Old Man: Certainly not.

Young Man: Sir, but why? What are you going to loose, if you tell me the time?
Old Man: Yes, I may loose something if I tell you the time.

Young Man: But Sir, can you tell me how?
Old Man : See, if I tell you the time you will definitely thank me and may be tomorrow again you will
ask me the time.


Young Man: Quite possible.
Old Man: May be we meet two three times more and you will ask my name and address.

Young Man: Quite possible.
Old Man: One day you may come to my house saying you were just passing by and came into wish me.
Then as a courtsey, I will offer you a cup of tea. After my courteous approach you will try to come
again.This time you will appreciate tea and ask who has made it.?

Young Man: Possible
Old Man: Then I will tell you that my daughter has and I will then have to introduce my young and
pretty daughter to you &; you will admire my daughter.

Young Man: Smiles.
Old Man: Now onwards you will try to meet my daughter again and again. You will offer her to go out for a
movie together and a date with you.

Young Man: Smiles
Old Man: My daughter may start liking you and start waiting for you. After meeting regularly you will fall
in love with her and propose her for marriage.

Young Man: Smiles
Old Man: One day both of you will come to me and tell me about your love and ask for my permission.


Young Man: Oh Yes! and smiles
Old Man: (Angrily) - Young man, I will never marry my Daughter to a person like you who does not even own a Watch.

Saturday, April 30, 2011

NR Murthy retiring from INFY

Narayana Murthy is Going to be Retired  from Infosys (INFY) by August 21, 2011


KV Kamath,63,  now going to be new Chairman of Infosys and will suceed the company founder NR Narayana Murthy on 21st August, 2011. 

Gopalakrishnan and Shibulal,  Only two of the original seven founders of the company will remain in the company.

SD Shibulal  will be CEO & MD of Infosys.
Kris Gopalakrishnan play elder brother at Infy as elevation of Kris Gopalkrishnan to the executive co-chairman of Infosys (from CEO) ensures his continuity.

-------------------------------------------
About Gopalkrishnana
Goplakrishnan took over as CEO When Infosys's revenue was $3 billion and the employee strength was 72000. Now the company has more than doubled its revenue to 6.2 billion dollar and has an employee strengthe of 1.3 lakh.
He holds a master's degree in Physics (1977) and computer science (1979) from the Indian Institute of Technology, Madras.
He started his career with Patni Computer Systems (PCS), Mumbai as a Software Engineer.
-------------------------------------
About SD Shibulala
Sarojini Damodaran Shibulala is the only child of his parents, his father Damodaran an Ayurvedic Doctor, and mother Sarojini a State Excise department employee.
He studied in Maharaja's college in Ernakulam, Where he met his wife Kumari. He recieved M.Sc. in Physics from the University of Kerala and later did an MS in Computer Science in Bangalore
Shibulala & Kumari have two children, daughter Shruti, who runs Caperberry restaurant, and son Shreyas, a class 11 student in Bangalore.
SD Shibulal works in Infy from its founding in 1981 except between 1991 and 1996, when he took a sabbatical and worked with Sun Microsystems.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
At this time Infosys is struggling with its larger rival TCS and gets a strong challenge from a slew of rivals like Cognizant. And under  tremendous pressure of  margins.

PRAYER OF LITTLE GIRL'S

PRAYER OF LITTLE GIRL'S



A father put his three year old daughter to bed, told her a story and listened to her prayers which she ended by saying
"God bless Mommy,
God bless daddy,
God bless grandma
and good-bye grandpa."
The father asked, "Why did you say good-bye grandpa?"
The little girl said, "I don't know daddy, it just seemed like the thing to do."

The next day grandpa died.
The father thought it was a strange coincidence.

A few months later the father put the girl to bed and listened to her prayers, which went like this:
"God bless Mommy,
God Bless daddy
and good-bye grandma."
The next day the grandmother died.
Oh my gosh, thought the father, this kid is in contact with the otherside.


Several weeks later when the girl was going to bed the dad heard her say "God bless Mommy
and good-bye daddy."

He practically went into shock. He couldn't sleep all night and got up at the crack of dawn to go to his office. He was nervous as a cat all day, had lunch sent in and watched the clock. He figured if he could get by until midnight he would be okay. He felt safe in the office, so instead of going home at the end of the day he
stayed there, drinking coffee, looking at his watch and jumping at every sound.


Finally midnight arrived, he breathed a sigh of relief and went home. When he got home his wife said "I've never seen you work so late, what's the matter?

"He said "I don't want to talk about it, I've just spent the worst day of my life."
She said "You think you had a bad day, you'll never believe what happened to me. This morning the milkman dropped dead on our porch."


(Only For Humour)

PERFORMANCE , POSITION & ST. PETER

PERFORMANCE , POSITION & ST. PETER

A priest dies and is waiting in line at the Pearly Gates. Ahead of him is a guy who's dressed in sunglasses, a loud shirt, leather jacket and jeans.


Saint Peter addresses him, "Who are you, so that I may know whether or not to admit you into the Kingdom of Heaven ?"

The guy replies, "I'm Joe Cohen, taxi driver, from New York ."

Saint Peter consults his list. He smiles and says to the taxi driver, " Take this silken robe and golden staff and enter the Kingdom of Heaven ."

Now it's the priest's turn. He stands erect and booms out, "I am the Right Reverend Joseph Snow, pastor of Saint Mary's for the last forty-three ye ars."

Saint Peter consults his list. He says to the priest, "Take this cotton robe and wooden staff and enter the Kingdom of Heaven ."

"Just a minute," says the priest. "That man was a taxi driver. Why does he get a silken robe and golden staff?"

"Results," ; shrugged Saint Peter. "While you preached, people slept. When he drove, people prayed."

Moral: It's Performance, Not Position that Counts ....!!

Love & Life

Life without love is like a tree without blossoms or fruits.



-- Kahlil Gibran

Sardar Jokes

Sardar Jokes  

Interviewer: what is your birth date?
 Sardar: 13th October
Which year?
Sardar : Oye ullu ke pathe _ _ _ EVERY YEAR
-------------------------------
Manager asked to sardar at an interview Can you spell a word that has more than 100 letters in it?
Sardar replyed: -P-O-S-T-B-O-X.
-------------------------------
Teacher to Sardar: Write your best friend's name in English.
Sardar wrote: ' Beautiful Red Underware'
Teacher: What? Sardar: His name is Sundar Lal Chadda
------------------------------ 
After returning back from a foreign trip, sardar asked his wife, Do I look like a foreigner?
Wife: No! Why?
Sardar: In London a lady asked me Are you a foreigner?
------------------------------
 One tourist from U.S.A. asked to Sardar: Any great man born in this village???
Sardar: no sir, only small Babies!!!
------------------------------
Lecturer: write a note on Gandhi Jayanthi
So Sardar writes, "Gandi was a great man, but I don't know who is Jayanthi.
-------------------------------
Sardar was doing experiment with cockroach, first he cut it's one leg and told WALK. WALK.
Cockroach walked.
Then he cut it's second leg and told the same.
Cockroach walked.
Then cut the third leg and did the same.
At last he cut it's fourth leg and ordered it walk!
But cockroach didn't walk. Suddenly sardar said loudly, "I found it. If we cut cockroach's four legs, it becomes deaf.
--------------------------------
When sarda r was traveling with his wife in an auto, the driver adjusted mirror.
Sardar shouted, "You are trying to see my wife? Sit back. I will drive.
-------------------------------
Sardar went in a hotel. To wash hands he went to the washbasin. There he started washing the basin.
Seeing this, the manager asked what was he doing.
 Sardar pointed towards the board "WASH BASIN"
--------------------------------
Interviewer: just imagine your in 3rd floor, it caught fire and how will you escape?
Sardar : its simple. I will stop my imagination!!!
--------------------------------
A sardar invested 2 Lakhs in a business and Suffered huge Loss.
Do u know what the business was? . . . .. . . . . .. . .
He opened a Saloon in Punjab!
-------------------------------
A Sardarji photographer is focusing a dead body's face in a funeral function, suddenly all dead persons relatives beat him.
why?
He said "SMILE PLEASE"
---------------------------
Sardarji gets ready, wears tie, coat, goes out, climbs tree, and sits on the branch regularly.
 A man asks why he does this.
Sardarji: "I've been promoted as branch manager."
----------------------------
Why is a Sardarji standing below a tube light with a open mouth..............
... Because his doctor advised him "Today's dinner should be light"
-----------------------------
One sardarji professor asked a plumber to come to his college.
U know Why?
 Because he wanted to check where the question paper is leaking...
---------------------------
Sardar told his servant: Go and water the plants.
Servant: It's already raining.
Sardar: So what take an umbrella and go.
-------------------------------
Sardar found the answer to the most difficult question ever - What will come first, Chicken or egg?
O Yaar, what ever u order first will come first.
------------------------------
 Postman: - I Have To Come 5 Miles to Deliver U This Packet
Sardar: - Why did u come so far.
 Instead u could have posted it....
-------------------------------
Sardar's wish: when i die, i wana die like my grandpa who died peacefully in his sleep not screaming like all d passengers in d bus he was driving..
-----------------------
A man asked sardarji, why Manmohan singh goes walking at evening not in the morning.
Sardarji replied ''Arey bhai Manmohan is PM not AM''.
---------------------
 Sardar visits Chinese friend dying in hospital.
The Chinese friend just says "CHIN YU YAN" and dies.
Sardarji goes 2 china 2 find meaning of friends last words. It is 'U R STANDNG ON the OXGN TUBE!"
-----------------------
Sardarji was standing in front of the mirror with his eyes closed.
His wife asked what you are doing.
 He said-I am seeing how I look while sleeping.
-----------------------
Why did Sardar cut the sides of the capsule before taking it?
Guess what...---To avoid side effect!!!
-----------------------
 Man: Sardarji where were u born?
Sardarji: Punjab.
Man: Which part?
Sardar: Oye part part kya kar raha hai, whole body is born in punjab".
--------------------
IN COURT during a case:
Lawyer to Sardar: Gita pe haath rakhkar kaho ke
Sardar: yeh kya, Sita pe haath lagaya to court me bulaiya.
ab kehte ho gita pe haath rakho.....
------------------------
 Sardar: For the past one week a girl is disturbing me.
I don't know how she got my number,
She interrupts whenever I call someone and says "please recharge your card"

True Fact

Happiness is NOT something you find,



It's something you create.






Nothing is this world is IMPOSSIBLE as


the word is "I M POSSIBLE ..."

Must Read : Amazing When You Read it, You Love it !!

MUST Read - MALE / FEMALE Readers,  Amazing  Humour !!!! ( Really You Love it)

A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods.
She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap.


The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes."
The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes.
Whatever you wish for, your husband will get times ten!" The woman said, "That's okay."
For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world.
The frog warned her, "You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis whom women will flock to".
The woman replied, "That's okay, because I will be the most beautiful Woman and he will have eyes only for me."
So, JAZAM-she's the most beautiful Woman in the world!


For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world.
The frog said, "That will make your husband the richest man in the world. And he will be ten times richer than you. "
The woman said, "That's okay, because what's mine is his and what's his is mine."
So, JAZAM-she's the richest woman in the world!


The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, "I'd like a mild heart attack."
Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don't mess with them.

Attention female readers:
This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling good.


Male readers: Please scroll down.
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The man had a heart attack ten times "milder" than his wife!!!
Moral of the story: Women are really dumb but think they're really smart.
Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show

PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this; it only goes to show that women never listen!!!
Forward this to all the guys for a good laugh, and to all the ladies who have a good sense :)

Newton's Laws of Ramance

Newton in romantic mood......


Universal law:
"Love can neither be created nor be destroyed; only it can transfer from One girlfriend to another girlfriend with some loss of money "

First Law:
"a boy in love with a girl, continue to be in love with her and a girl in love with a boy, continue to be in love with him, until or unless any external agent(brother or father of the gal) comes into play and break the legs of the boy. "
------------------------------
Second Law:
"the rate of change of intensity of love of a girl towards a boy is directly proportional to the instantaneous bank balance of the boy and the direction of this love is same to as increment or decrement of the bank balance. "
-------------------------------
Third Law:
" the force applied while proposing a girl by a boy is equal and opposite to the force applied by the girl while slapping."



Genelia D'Souza Biography

Genelia D'Souza Biography 2011

Height: 5′ 6½” (1.69 m)
Weight: 50 kg
Age: 26 years old
Date of Birth: 5 August 1987
Place of birth: Bombay, Maharashtra, India
Birth Name: Genelia De Souza
Mother: Jeanette D’Souza
Father: Neil D’Souza
Nickname: Teenage Superstar of Bollywood, Cheenu

She studied at Apostolic Carmel High School in Bandra Mumbai. After Schooling she joined the St.Andrews College,Bandra to pursue a Bachelor's Degree.
She was popular in Tollywood as well as in Bollywood. She has acted in many films in South Indian Cimena.
She has appeared in Telugu and Hindi language films, as well as Tamil and Kannada language films. D’Souza first hit the limelight in a Parker Pen commercial with Amitabh Bachchan.
Her acting debut was in the Hindi movie Tujhe Meri Kasam in 2003, But She get regnition from Tamil film Boys the same year, which was directed by Shankar. In this movie she acted with famous and popular hero Siddhartha.
Genelia has acted so far over a dozen Telugu ,Tamil and Hindi Movies.She acted in the movies like "Satyam" , "Sye", " Happy"," Bommarillu", abd Dhee. In these movies Bommarillu is the biggest hit in Genelia's career. From that movie she was popularly called as Hasini.After that She comes in many movies -
Mere Baap Pehle Aap (2008), Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na (2008),  Life Partner (2009), Chance Pe Dance(2010), Uthama Puthiran(2010), and Orange (2010)

The Most Important Thing in Genelia is - A Smiling Face (100 Watt Smile),
You will find almost all pictures with a Smile (Great Teeth & Good Looking Face - Perfect Photo)

DICTIONARY DECODING - MAN & WOMAN

DICTIONARY DECODING - MAN & WOMAN

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS:

40-ish...............49.
Adventurous..........Slept with everyone.
Athletic.............No breasts.
Average looking......Moooo.
Beautiful............Pathological liar.
Emotionally Secure.........On medication.
Feminist.............Fat.
Free spirit..........Junkie.
Friendship first.....Former slut.
New-Age..............Body hair in the wrong places.
Old-fashioned........No BJs.
Open-minded..........Desperate.
Outgoing.............Loud and Embarrassing.
Professional.........Bitch.
Voluptuous...........Very Fat.
Large frame..........Hugely Fat.
Wants Soul mate.........Stalker.

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN'S ENGLISH:
1. Yes = No
2. No = Yes
3. Maybe = No
4. We need = I want
5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry
6. We need to talk = you're in trouble
7. Sure, go ahead = you better not
8. Do what you want = you will pay for this later
9. I am not upset = Of course, I am upset, doesn't it look like I'm upset, you moron!
10. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING MEN'S ENGLISH:
1. I am hungry = I am hungry
2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
3. I am tired = I am tired
4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
5. I love you = let's have sex now
6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you.
8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you.
9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you.
10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you.
11. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit. = I'm gay

Man Discovered What ? What woman Discovered ??

Man Discovered What ? What woman Discovered ??

Man discovered COLORS and invented PAINT;
woman discovered PAINT and invented MAKEUP.

Man discovered the WORD and invented CONVERSATION;
woman discovered CONVERSATION and invented GOSSIP.

Man discovered AGRICULTURE and invented FOOD;
woman discovered FOOD and invented DIET.

Man discovered FRIENDSHIP and invented LOVE;
woman discovered LOVE and invented LOVE TRIANGLES.

Man discovered TRADING and invented MONEY;
woman discovered MONEY and invented SHOPPING.

Thank U For Being Friend To My Blog

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__***____HEARTBEATS R COUNTLESS____***__

__***_______SPIRITS R AGELESS_______***__

___***_______DREAMS R ENDLESS_____***__

____***FRIENDS LIKE U R PRICELESS__***___

_____***______thx_4_being _______***_____

______***_________MY_____ _____***_____

________***_____FRIEND___ ____***_______

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MARRIAGE MATHS

MARRIAGE MATHS


Women who love sex + men who love sex = Loving home with Many children

Men who hate sex + Women who love sex = Broken home with Many Children


Men who love sex + Women who hate sex =Broken home with No Children


Men who hate sex + women who hate sex = Loving home with No children

I Can Do, Can YOU Do ???

I Can Do, Can YOU Do ??? 

Can SEE 'TEA' in A TEA-CUP
Can you SEE the WORLD in WORLD-CUP?

I can SING on Any STAGE
Can you SING in COMA-STAGE?

I can FIX my PASSPORT Size PHOTO in My PASSPORT
Can you FIX Your STAMP Size PHOTO in a STAMP?


I Can SEND My ADDRESS to Your MOBILE
Can You SEND Your MOBILE to my ADDRESS?

TRY ALL THIS........ ....
Atleast DO the LAST ONE Plzz

some facts for u all

Hi frndzz.. some facts for u all ! !


1. Chewing on gum while cutting onions can help a person from stop producing tears. Try it next time you chop onions.
2. Until babies are six months old, they can breathe and swallow at the same time. Indeed convenient!
3. Offered a new pen to write with, 97% of all people will write their own name.
4. Male mosquitoes are vegetarians. Only females bite. Hi All,
5. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.
6. Grapes explode when you put them in the microwave.
7.Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.

FACTS TO MAKE EVERY Indian PROUD

FACTS TO MAKE EVERY Indian PROUD


Q. Who is the GM of Hewlett Packard (hp) ?
A. Rajiv Gupta


Q. Who is the creator of Pentium chip (needs no introduction as 90% of the today's computers run on it)?
A. Vinod Dahm


Q. Who is the founder and creator of Hotmail (Hotmail is world's No.1 web based email program)?
A. Sabeer Bhatia

Q. Who is the president of AT & T-Bell Labs (AT & T-Bell Labs is the creator of program languages such as C, C++, Unix to name a few)?
A. Arun Netravalli

Q. Who is the MTD (Microsoft Testing Director) of Windows 2000, responsible to iron out all initial problems?
A. Sanjay Tejwrika

Q. Who are the Chief Executives of CitiBank, Mckensey & Stanchart?
A. Victor Menezes, Rajat Gupta, and Rana Talwar.

Q. We Indians are the wealthiest among all ethnic groups in America , even faring better than the whites and the natives.


There are 3.22 millions of Indians in USA (1.5% of population). AND,
38% of doctors in USA are Indians.
12% scientists in USA are Indians.
36% of NASA scientists are Indians.
34% of Microsoft employees are Indians.
28% of IBM employees are Indians.
17% of INTEL scientists are Indians.
13% of XEROX employees are! Indians.

Some of the following facts may be known to you. These facts were published in a German magazine, which deals with WORLD HISTORY
FACTS ABOUT INDIA .
1. India never invaded any country in her last 1000 years of history.
2. India invented the Number system. Zero was invented by Aryabhatta.
3. The world's first University was established in Takshila in 700BC.
More than 10,500 students from all over the world studied more than 60 subjects. The University of Nalanda built in the 4th century BC was one of the greatest achievements of ancient India in the field of education.
4. According to the Forbes magazine, Sanskrit is the most suitable language for computer software.
5. Ayurveda is the earliest school of medicine known to humans.
6. Although western media portray modern images of India as poverty striken and underdeveloped through political corruption, India was once the richest empire on earth.
7. The art of navigation was born in the river Sindh 5000 years ago. The very word "Navigation" is derived from the Sanskrit word NAVGATIH.
8. The value of pi was first calculated by Budhayana, and he explained the concept of what is now k! nown as the Pythagorean Theorem. British scholars have last year (1999) officially published that Budhayan's
works dates to the 6 th Century which is long before the European mathematicians.
9. Algebra, trigonometry and calculus came from India . Quadratic equations were by Sridhara charya in the 11 th Century; the largest numbers the Greeks and the Romans used were 106 whereas Indians used
numbers as big as 1053.
10. According to the Gemmological Institute of America, up until 1896, India was the only source of diamonds to the world.
11. USA based IEEE has proved what has been a century-old suspicion amongst academics that the pioneer of wireless communicat ion was Pr!ofessor Jagdeesh Bose and not Marconi.
12. The earliest reservoir and dam for irrigation was built in Saurashtra.
13. Chess was invented in India
14. Sushruta is the father of surgery. 2600 years ago he and health scientists of his time conducted surgeries like cesareans, cataract, fractures and urinary stones. Usage of anaesthesia was well known in ancient India .
15. When many cultures in t he world were only nomadic forest dwellers over 5000 years ago, Indians established Harappan culture in Sindhu Valley ( Indus Valley Civilisation).
16. The place value system, the decimal system was developed in India in 100 BC.

Quotes about India
We owe a lot to the Indians, who taught us how to count, without which no worthwhile scientific discovery could have been made. Albert Einstein.
India is the cradle of the human race, the birthplace of human speech, the mother of history, the grandmother of legend and the great grand mother of tradition. Mark Twain.
If there is one place on the face of earth where all dreams of living men have found a home from the very earliest days when man began the dream of existence, it is India. French scholar Romain Rolland.
India conquered and dominated China culturally for 20 centuries without ever having to send a single soldier across her border.Hu Shih (former Chinese ambassador to USA )

ALL OF THE ABOVE IS JUST THE TIP OF THE ICEBERG, THE LIST COULD BE ENDLESS.
BUT, if we don't see even a glimpse of that great India in the India that we see today, it clearly means that we are not working up to our potential; and that if we do, we could once again be an evershining and
inspiring country setting a bright path for rest of the world to follow.